Sunday, June 15, 2014

Rent-A-Cop (1987)

Burt Reynolds Film Fest Movie #2

Synopsis: Hmm...if Blockbuster Video was still around, I'd probably call this one Rent-A-Flop

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “Burt Reynolds and Liza Minnelli star as Detective Tony Church and hooker Della Roberts in this high voltage thriller set in the hustling back streets of Chicago.” 

What Did I Learn?: Apparently, the biggest drug dealer in Chicago is a wealthy, upper-crust Englishman who's always dressed in a tuxedo. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You know it isn't easy to be a rent-a-cop.

Really?: 1) So wait... Della mentions something about attending a party with some ex-cops, and Tony immediately jumps to the conclusion that it must be connected to the guy trying to kill her? WTF? 2) See: "What Did I Learn?" 3) Hold on - Dancer double-crosses Alexander, and yet he still uses him for wet work? And holy shit, if Dancer pointed a loaded gun at me during a a work-related conversation, I would never speak to him again.

Rating: Both Burt and Liza slammed Rent-A-Cop years ago, so I don’t think I’m breaking any new ground by saying this film is terrible. Rent-A-Cop looks and feels like a low-budget, made-for-TV movie with a lazy, formulaic plot, a laughably cheesy villain, and God-awful dialogue, but all of that is just the tip of the iceberg. Reynolds essentially sleepwalks through the picture (I get the feeling he really didn’t want to be there), while Minelli is a profoundly irritating bundle of hyperactive energy; together, they have zero screen chemistry. I cannot recommend this movie. 3/10 stars.

Would It Work For a Bad Movie Night?: Maybe... take a drink every time somebody addresses Reynolds as "Church" or "Churchy." Holy crap, it gets annoying. His character's name is Tony Church - how about using "Tony" once in a while?

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