Four Rooms (1995)

 

Synopsis: Obsequious bellboy encounters four different sets of completely unlikeable loons on the last night of the year. 

Blurb From the DVD jacket: “Comedy, Confusion and Chaos… Compliments of the House!”

What Did I Learn?: 1) Everybody starts out as strangers. It’s where we end up that counts 2)  "The less a man makes declarative statements, the less apt he is to look foolish in retrospect.” 3) A person’s life is filled with a zillion little experiences. 4) Every other champagne aside from Cristal is “piss.” 

You Might Like This Movie If: you really want to maximize space efficiency in four rooms. 

Really?: 1) So, wait - it’s New Year’s Eve, and Sam is the only employee on duty at the hotel? That doesn’t sound right. 2) It’s funny how Sam suddenly transforms from a Jerry Lewis/Stan Laurel-type of loveable dimwit into a screaming tyrant who puts Vicks Vape-o-Rub on the eyelids of small children in the third sketch. Film critic Roger Ebert really liked this sketch, but it doesn’t comport with our previous understanding of the character, and it makes Sam completely unlikeable, in my opinion. 3) Um….wouldn’t the hotel be crawling with detectives, police officers and possibly reporters after the discovery of the dead hooker in the third sketch? 

Rating: Comprised of four separate sketches, all featuring Tim Roth as a suffering hotel employee, Four Rooms had the potential to be an outstanding slapstick farce. Unfortunately, none of the four scripts were all that good, and two sketches are simply terrible. Roth does his best with the material, but the final product is a loud, unfunny mess. I cannot recommend this movie. 4/10 stars. 

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113101/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0

25th Hour (2002)

 

Synopsis: Unapologetic New York drug dealer comes to the startling realization that seven years of prison isn’t going to be a whole lot of fun. 

Blurb From the DVD jacket: “In 24 short hours, Monty Brogan (Edward Norton) goes to prison for seven long years. Once a king of Manhattan, Monty is about to say goodbye to the life he knew - a life that opened doors to New York’s swankiest clubs but also alienated him from the people closest to him.” 

What Did I Learn?: 1) Prison is a bad place to be. 2) A man should never go into a Victoria’s Secret store and ask: “does this come in children’s sizes? 3) Sway is….a) walking into the best five-star restaurant in the city, without a reservation, and being seated right away…. b) making a phone call in the morning and having curtsied seats, Madison Square Garden, that evening… c) entering a club through the staff entrance, so you can skip the line, the cover charge and the metal detector…. d) locking eyes with an undercover cop on the subway. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You believe there are 25 hours in a day. 

Really?: 1) I had a bit of a hard time believing that Monty would suspect Naturelle (Rosario Dawson) of dropping a dime on him even though they have been living together for months after the arrest and trial. Most people aren’t that cold-blooded. 2) I realize Jacob (Philip Seymour Hoffman) isn’t getting any, but there’s no way a teacher would throw away his career and risk a jail sentence by lusting after, and kissing a teenaged student. 

Rating: 25th Hour is a thoughtful, compelling and credible look at a young man who clearly has a lot on his mind at a troubling time in his life. Highly recommended. 9/10 stars. 

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0307901/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0

Garden State (2004)

 

Synopsis: Underachieving Cold fish slowly begins to understand how psychiatry and antidepressants pretty much ruined the last two decades of his life. 

Blurb From the DVD jacket: “Twentysomething, emotionally detached Andrew Largeman (Zach Braff) returns home to New Jersey after nine long years.” 

What Did I Learn?: 1) Wow….Natalie Portman is a pretty good actress. I didn’t get that impression from those tedious Star Wars prequels. 2) If you can’t laugh at yourself, life is going to seem a whole lot longer than you’d like. 3) Sidecars are for bitches. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You want to learn everything you can about the Garden State. 

Really?: 1) Wow…Andrew is back in town for what: a day, and he meets a cute girl who really, really likes him. That happens to me all the time! 2) Is it just me, or is Andrew pretty emotionally well-adjusted for a guy who decides on a whim to stop taking his anti-depressants, and verbally confront his estranged father? 

Rating: I wasn’t too sure what to expect when I popped Garden State into my DVD player (most likely something similar to Outside Providence), but I have to admit that I was impressed. Garden State is a bit meandering for my taste, but it's also an intelligent, and genuinely touching comedy-drama that’s worth a look. 8/10 stars. 

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0333766/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0

The Florentine (1999)

 

Synopsis: It’s basically a bunch of loveable losers interacting with each other in a dive bar somewhere in small-town Pennsylvania….so just imagine a low-rent version of Cheers combined with the first 45 minutes of The Deer Hunter. 

Blurb From the VHS jacket: “A place to go when there’s nowhere left to turn.” 

What Did I Learn?: Compound interest is man’s greatest invention, at least according to Luke Perry. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You love all things florentine.

Really?: 1) I realize Chris Penn’s character becomes disgusted when he realizes he’s part of a criminal enterprise that hurts people, but NOBODY would throw a roll of $100 bills out of a moving car. 2) So wait, Burt Young’s gangster character discovers somebody has been passing around counterfeit money, he’s on the hook to reimburse a bunch of people, he decides to take action, and…nothing. This subplot is never resolved. 

Rating: I have to say that I wanted to like The Florentine a bit more than I did. It’s a low-budget, character-driven film that never really goes anywhere. The Florentine features a talented cast of performers, but the storytelling is rather unfocused, and the audience isn’t given many reasons to care about any of these characters. 6/10 stars. 

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0132164/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_