1970s Disaster Movie
#1 (Please click the links to read my reviews of The Towering Inferno, The Poseidon Adventure, and Beyond the Poseidon Adventure)
Synopsis: Melodrama
at 30,000 feet!
Blurb From the VHS
Jacket: “Take a nonstop flight with an all-star cast to world of tension-filled human drama in this
trend-setting box office blockbuster. Based on Arthur Hailey’s runaway
bestseller, the emotion-charged adventure stars Burt Lancaster as the manager
of a glamorous international airport who must juggle personal crises with
professional responsibilities as he attempts to keep his blizzard torn facility
open to rescue a bomb-damaged jetliner.”
What Did I Learn?:
1) Um... if your motive is to blow up a
transatlantic flight and make your wife a rich widow, you might want to bring
some luggage (besides a tightly-gripped attaché case) along, and you probably
don’t want to buy your flight insurance right before takeoff. 2) The Boeing 707
can do anything but read. 3) Bored housewives never understand it when real
men with real jobs have to stay late to deal with an emergency snowstorm.
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Movie If: You firmly believe Dean Martin and airplanes go together like peanut butter and jelly.
Really?: 1) So
wait... why couldn’t the plane land in Toronto or Cleveland? Why does it have
to return to Chicago, when it’s painfully obvious that isn’t a convenient
location? 2) Speaking of “convenient”, isn’t it fortuitous when Mel Bakersfeld’s
(Burt Lancaster) admits to an affair, thereby allowing him to ask out Tanya Livingstone. 3) So wait... Joe
Patroni is ordered by Bakersfeld to turn off the 707 engines, and he instead
guns them and saves the day. I don’t suppose he gives a shit about keeping his
job, or destroying an airplane that’s said to be worth $8 million in 1970
dollars. 4) Gee... even though it's the worst snowstorm in six years, Guerrero's wife (Maureen O'Hara) and Mrs. Bakersfeld seem to have no trouble making to the airport.
Rating: Burt
Lancaster apparently called this movie “the worst piece of junk ever made.” Airport isn’t quite that bad, but the
dialogue is terrible, the storyline focuses far too much on the personal
problems of its characters, and it’s obvious that everyone is trying way too
hard. Check it out if you’ve ever wanted to see Lancaster interact with Dean
Martin, or if you want to understand the source material for those Airplane! parodies. 5.5/10 stars.
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