Go (1999)

Synopsis: Hmm…three intersecting stories of various lowlifes are told consecutively. Hey, it’s just like Pulp Fiction, albeit without any big stars or a kick-ass soundtrack. [Ok, I guess Katie Holmes is now a big star]

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “RONNA needs to make some extra cash. SIMON wants to escape to Vegas for the weekend. ADAM and ZACK want to stay out of trouble. But it’s not just another night in the life of these unusual characters. They’re about to embark on a wild ride that won’t end until the sun comes up.” 

What Did I Learn?: 1) If a strip club bouncer ever warns you against touching an exotic dancer during a private lap dance, for crying out loud, DON’T TOUCH HER! 2) The Family Circus comic strip is always there – in the lower right hand corner of the newspaper, just waiting to suck. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You know that drugs are bad, mmmkay.

 

Really?: 1) I had a hard time believing Marcus (Taye Diggs) would ever hang out with Tiny and Singh (to say nothing of that idiot, Simon), considering he seems to be a whole lot smarter than any of them. 2) So wait – Claire sees the drug dealer who held her as a hostage the night before, and she sits down at his table at the diner for breakfast? And he allows this, even though he tried to bump off her friend just a few hours earlier? Oh, come on… 

Rating: Go is a fun, roller-coaster ride of a movie about a drug deal gone bad. I’m not a big Sarah Polley fan, but she gives a great performance as the cynical, and world-weary Ronna. My only complaint about Go is that it’s wildly uneven. The movie was originally written as a short film about the first storyline, and the others were created later, so there isn’t a lot of cohesion among them – they don't feel like they belong together. The Ronna story is a lot darker than the Simon-in-Vegas misadventure, while the third involving Zack and Andy is actually a bit dull. 8/10 stars. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0139239/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

Chasers (1994)

Synopsis: It’s Erika Eleniak’s greatest cinematic triumph since Under Siege!

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “Navy Shore Patrol lifer Rock Reilley (Tom Berenger) has seen it all. His upstart new partner Eddie Devane (William McNamara) has seen enough: he’s ready for discharge. But they haven’t seen anything until they meet feisty and beautiful Ensign Toni Johnson (Erika Eleniak), the prisoner they’re supposed to escort to base in Chasers, a rollicking road adventure directed by Dennis Hopper and featuring Gary Busey, Marilu Henner, Crispin Glover, Dean Stockwell and Hopper himself in colourful supporting roles.” 

What Did I Learn?: Apparently, disguises – even bad ones – always work. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You have questionable tastes, and you'll watch anything from 1994.

 

Really?: 1) We learn right at the beginning that Eddie is ripping off the Navy to the tunes of hundreds of thousands of dollars, and this is somehow simply incidental to the plot? 2) So wait, desk jockey Eddie can out-fight (or at least hold his own) in a brawl with Rock? Come on…. 3) See: “What Did I Learn?”

Rating: I wanted to like Chasers a lot more than I did. The film never takes itself too seriously, it boasts an impressive cast, and even provides a few laughs here and there. Moreover, Eleniak is incredibly sexy in several scenes, even if she was woefully miscast in her role. Unfortunately, none of the lead characters are terribly likeable (for that matter, Berenger plays Rock almost as a cartoon) and the story becomes increasingly contrived; how do these guys keep getting into random fights, and just how long a trip is it back to the base? By the end, I really didn't care. I cannot recommend this movie. 4.5/10 stars. 

Would It Work For a Bad Movie Night?: Sure - take a drink any time Berenger tells somebody to shut up. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109403/?ref_=nv_sr_1

The Flamingo Kid (1984)

Synopsis: Hmm….Garry Marshall….early 1960s….likeable, blue collar ethnic kid falls for cute, rich, WASP girl at an expensive beach club…oh my God, it’s basically Chachi Gets a Summer Job! 

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “Everything was settled for 18-year old Jeffrey Willis (MATT DILLON), the plumber’s son from Brooklyn: one last summer of carefree fun before college. That was until his friends come speeding up in their 1960 convertible to invite Jeffrey for an innocent day at their parents fancy beach club on Long Island.” [“…at their parents fancy beach club?”] 

What Did I Learn?: If you want to sound like a pretentious snob, ask your Mom why she doesn’t serve aspic for dinner. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You have an endless appetite for 1960s boomer nostalgia.

Really?: 1) Funny how Alfred Schultz (a pre-Beverly Hills Cop Bronson Pinchot) more-or-less disappears somewhere near the middle of this movie. Come to think of it, Jeffrey falls for Carla (played by the future Mrs. Wayne Gretsky, Janet Jones), and the love interest basically becomes a minor sub-plot. 2) I have to wonder: did Caucasian and African-American teenagers hang out together all that much in New York in the early 1960s? It’s interesting how Jeffrey has a black friend at the club, and race never becomes an issue – even when they piss off a gang of local toughs. 

Rating: The Flamingo Kid is an enjoyable, and very easy-going coming-of-age comedy that features a good performance from Dillon, and great ones from Hector Elizondo as his stressed-out father, and Richard Crenna as the rich-but-oily car salesman. Watch for Marisa Tomei and John Turturro in early roles. 8/10 stars. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087265/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

About a Boy (2002)

Synopsis: Shallow, unreliable, emotionally-stunted womanizing asshole befriends precocious-and-unpopular pre-teen boy because…um… um…you know, the premise of this film isn’t all that plausible. 

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “Will Lightman (Hugh Grant) is a good-looking, smooth-talking bachelor whose primary goal in life is avoiding any kind of responsibility. But when he invents an imaginary son in order to meet attractive single moms, Will gets a hilarious lesson about life from a bright, but hopelessly geeky 12-year old named Marcus.” 

What Did I Learn?: 1) A person's life is like a TV show. 2) Once you open your door to one person anyone can come in.

You Might Like This Movie If: You know that high school concerts are bad news.

 

Really?: About a Boy is a nice little film, but it requires you to believe: a) Marcus would willingly subject himself to the ridicule of the entire school with a performance of “Killing Me Softly,” and b) Will wouldn’t simply call the police or the boy’s mom to make him stop ringing the doorbell (see: “Synopsis”).

Rating: About a Boy is a likeable and bittersweet comedy-drama that certainly tugs the heartstrings. The script is cleverly written, and Grant and Nicholas Hoult (Marcus) work well together, but I frequently had a great deal of trouble believing these characters would behave as they do (see: “Really” and “Synopsis”). I also hate cringe-inducing awkward moments, and this film is chock full of them. 7.5/10 stars. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0276751/?ref_=nv_sr_2

Body Shots (1999)

Synopsis: It’s a bit like 45 minutes of Swingers followed by 45 minutes of an ABC After School Special.

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “Meet Rick, Jane, Whitney, Trent, Karen, Michael and Sara. By day, they’re successful, young urban professionals. But when the night hits, they’re ready to let go and live out their fantasies. Until one late evening of club-hopping and hard-partying, the passions of two people spin way out of control.” 

What Did I Learn?: Apparently, it’s possible to have sex on top of a parked car, maybe ten feet away from a busy club entrance, and nobody will care. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You know that nothing good ever comes after a round of shooters.

 

Really?: 1) Wow, so all of these people are in their early-mid 20s, and they’re already financially successful? 2) So, um….did Michael rape Sara or not? I don’t want to give away any  spoilers, but I think this question deserves to be answered. 3) So wait – Trent sneaks into the club by lifting a loose bit of chain link fence near a side entrance? Wouldn’t that opening have become obvious or apparent to other club-goers (or the bouncers) long before he simply stumbles upon it? 

Rating: Body Shots starts out relatively well, as a raunchy – and intermittently funny – sex comedy that takes a wrong turn at the mid-way point and suddenly becomes weird and uncomfortable once news of the rape becomes public knowledge. To be honest, Body Shots feels like two very different movies that were strung together.  The film is also undermined by the fact that most of the characters are incredibly unlikeable. I cannot recommend this movie. 4.5/10 stars

Would It Work For a Bad Movie Night?: Maybe…take a drink any time a male character mentions “pussy.” 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0172627/?ref_=nv_sr_1