The Madness of King George (1994)

Synopsis: It’s good to be the king! Well… 

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “His majesty was all powerful and all knowing. But he wasn’t quite all there.” 

What Did I Learn?: 1) “One may produce a copious, regular evacuation every day of the week and still be a stranger to reason.” 2) “Six hours of sleep is enough for a man, seven for a woman, and eight for a fool.” 3) “To be Prince of Wales is not a position - it is a predicament.” 

You Might Like This Movie If: You've always wanted to see a king descend into madness.

 

Really?: Hold on – the king’s personal attendants make a point that his urine is blue (suggesting George III may have suffered from porphyria) and yet the audience never gets to see the unusual pee? How blue was it? Are we talking Windex?

Rating:  Nigel Hawthorne – best remembered as the scheming Sir Humphrey Appleby on Yes, Minister – gives a tour-de-force performance as the troubled British monarch. The Madness of King George is an intelligent, often-funny film that suffers from one serious problem: none of the characters are particularly sympathetic, or likeable. I mean, are we supposed to cheer at the end when George III, fully-restored in his powers, orders his doctor (Ian Holm) not to look him in the eye, or when he fires the assistant who was kind to him during his treatment? 8.5/10 stars.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0110428/?ref_=nm_knf_t4

Deconstructing Harry (1997)

Schuster at the Movies is saddened by the recent passing of Robin Williams, who had a small part in this film as a mysteriously out-of-focus actor. Williams' manic, rapid-fire stand-up style was never my cup of tea (which is why I was a little unkind to him in my review of Good Morning Vietnam), but he delivered stellar performances in a number of films (Dead Poets Society, The Fisher King and Cadillac Men come to mind) and I liked him when he didn't attempt to overpower every scene. Please click the links to read my reviews of One Hour Photo, The Fisher King, Dead Again, Cadillac Man and Good Morning Vietnam. 

Synopsis: Woody Allen portrays a self-centred, neurotic New York intellectual who…. Oh wait, that pretty much describes every Woody Allen movie!

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “Harry Block has gone through three wives, six psychiatrists and dozens of girlfriends during his long literary career. But when Harry writes a bestseller about his best friends, his best friends become his worst enemies.” 

What Did I Learn?: 1) “The most important words in the English language are not "I love you" but "It's benign." 2) In France, somebody could run for office and win with the slogan: “nihilism, cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.” 3) “All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.”

You Might Like This Movie If: You'll watch anything that involves a good deconstruction.

 

Really?: 1) I realize Fay (Elizabeth Shue) is supposed to be a huge fan of Harry’s work, but I had a bit of trouble believing she would fall for a 60-something guy who looks like Woody Allen. Speaking of which, isn’t Allen a little old to play the father of a very young child? 2) Hold on – Harry picks up his son for the road trip to the university ceremony and he still brings the hooker along for the ride? It’s a funny situation, but come on…. 

Rating: Deconstructing Harry is an excellent example of Woody Allen at his best; the film is laugh-out-loud funny, cleverly-written, and boasts an impressive cast of performers including Billy Crystal, Tobey Maguire, Julia Louis Dreyfus, and of course the late Robin Williams. And I have to give kudos to Allen for making Harry interesting and strangely sympathetic, even though it soon becomes obvious he has spent years crapping on everyone in his life. Highly recommended. 9/10 stars. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0118954/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_48

The Negotiator (1998)

Synopsis: Framed cop desperately attempts to prove his innocence in a murder investigation by, um… beating up police officers and holding innocent bystanders at gunpoint? WTF?

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “As two of the best Chicago negotiators, Danny Roman and Chris Sabian know all the tricks. Sabian will try to get into Roman’s head, manipulate his emotions, defuse the situation and rescue the hostages Roman holds at gunpoint. But Roman knows the strategy – he’s used it before.”

What Did I Learn?: 1) Pit bulls are the “dog of dogs.”  2) It’s a bad idea to say “no” during hostage negotiations. 3) “If I ask you a question about something visual, like your favorite color, your eyes go up and to the left. Neurophysiology tells us your eyes go in that direction, because you're accessing the visual cortex. So you're telling the truth. If your eyes go up and right, you're accessing the brain's creative centers and we know you're full of shit.”

You Might Like This Movie If: You'll watch anything that involves negotiating for hostages

 

Really?: 1) You know, I’m pretty sure that somebody would have wasted Danny (Samuel L. Jackson) during that whole “you want my blood? Take my blood!” scene when he stands completely exposed to police snipers. 2) I realize Danny is eventually cleared of the murder, and Disability Fund theft charges, but I have to wonder: is he going to face criminal charges for kidnapping, assault with a deadly weapon, etc…? Can he honestly take over a government office, shoot at police officers and walk away from the whole thing scot-free? 

Rating: The Negotiator is a highly-contrived, yet enjoyable action-thriller. 7/10 stars. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120768/?ref_=nv_sr_1

The Doors (1991)

Synopsis: It’s a tedious hour of “Wow, Jim – you’re a genius!,” followed by  an unwatchable hour of “No, Jim – don’t do it!!” 

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “Jim Morrison (Val Kilmer), one of the most sensual and exciting figures in the history of rock and roll, explodes on the screen in ‘THE DOORS’, the electrifying movie about a time called the sixties and a legendary outlaw who rocked America’s consciousness – forever.” 

What Did I Learn?: Ladies, if your boyfriend hands you a carving knife and asks you to plunge it into him, or steps out on the ledge of a high building and threatens to jump unless you promise to “die for” him, it’s time to reassess the relationship. 

You Might Like This Movie If: you want to be transported to a bygone era... and you find doors to be curiously entertaining.

 

Really?: So, Morrison blows off the network guy’s request and makes a drug reference on the Ed Sullivan Show. Um, how did the other members of the band feel about that? It’s funny how they’re in the movie, but essentially minor characters. 

Rating: While I have to applaud Val Kilmer’s magnificent performance as the troubled Jim Morrison, and admire some of Oliver Stone’s impressive cinematography in this picture, The Doors is, quite simply, atrocious. There’s no character development, no real plot to speak of, and every other character besides Morrison is simply window-dressing. The film’s biggest problem, however, is that Stone simply doesn’t know how to portray his subject: was Morrison an enlightened poet, or just a violent, self-destructive, drugged-up idiot? Instead of providing a clear answer, Stone tries to have it both ways, and gives us a series of video montages and psychedelic Jim’s-wacked-out-on-drugs scenes that get old, fast. Keep these doors closed! I cannot recommend this movie. 4/10 stars. 

Would It Work For a Bad Movie Night?: Absolutely! Take a drink every time Jim Morrison flouts the norms of civilized society and some old fuddy-duddy gets really, really steamed. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101761/?ref_=rvi_tt

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World (1963)

Synopsis: World’s most obnoxious people search for buried treasure as they’re pursued by the world’s most incompetent police department. 

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “On a winding desert highway, eight vacation-bound motorists share an experience that alters their plans – and their lives! After a mysterious stranger divulges the location of a stolen fortune, they each speed off in a mind-bending, car-bashing race for the loot – and the most side-splitting laughfest in history.” 

What Did I Learn?: The first time Ethel Merman yells: “shut up,” it’s sort-of funny. The fortieth time, not so much. 

You Might Like This Movie If: You want to see how much this mad, mad, mad, mad world has changed over the past 50 years.

 

Really?: It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World is a screwball comedy, and it isn’t meant to be taken all that seriously. That said, I have to make the following points: 1) The entire premise of this film makes no sense – the four parties have to cooperate. If anyone in the four vehicles doesn’t receive a share, that person could simply call the cops and get the others arrested. 2) If Russell Finch (Milton Berle) needs time to recover from a nervous breakdown, why in the world would he agree to bring his horrible mother-in-law (Merman) along for the ride? It’s also funny how Emeline never once realizes her mom might just rub others the wrong way. 3) Hold on – the Santa Anita cops have everyone under surveillance, and yet they allow Pike (Jonathan Winters) to destroy a gas station and nearly kill the proprietors, and the Crumps to blow up a hardware store just because everyone’s in a race? WTF? I smell a huge lawsuit… 

Rating: As I watched It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, it reminded me bit of the completely-different Risky Business – both are films I really enjoyed as a kid, but no longer hold my interest. There are plenty of laughs in Mad World (Phil Silvers is a delight as the cheerful-but-slimy Otto Meyer), but it’s far too long, it quickly descends into a whole lot of explosions and car crashes, and Ethel Merman’s character is so toxically obnoxious that she ruins nearly every scene in which she appears. 6.5/10 stars. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0057193/?ref_=nv_sr_1