Saturday, January 21, 2012

3000 Miles to Graceland (2001)

Synopsis: Likeable ex-con, kleptomaniac brat and World’s Worst Mom evade Elvis-crazed, homicidal lunatic across American West.

Blurb From the VHS Jacket: “Ladies and gentlemen, Elvis has left the building... with $3.2 million in stolen jack.”

What Did I Learn?: Even a badass mercenary like Ice-T will eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich if he’s hungry enough.

You Might Like This Movie If: You really, really love the Wombats!  

Really?: Why does Kevin Costner try so hard to save the life of one of his henchmen when he’s going to kill his crime partners, anyway? Why does he kill the gas station attendant, blow up(!!!) the station, murder a sheriff in cold blood, and leave a trail of crime the cops can follow to Boise? Wouldn’t Kurt Russell have immediately known his wallet was gone when he put on his pants? Why...ok, I’m going to stop, now.

Rating: Clocking in at 125 minutes, 3000 Miles to Graceland is an overly-long, gratuitously violent, idiotic piece of crap. The film does contain some decent (albeit rather implausible) action sequences and a few laughs, however, so I’ll give it a couple of extra stars. 3.5/10 stars.

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